“But my question, which is just a straight, honest question, is: Is [Robert Griffin III] a brother or is he a cornball brother?”
Rob Parker, ESPN commentator, ESPN
GH: Rob Parker, a formerly anonymous newspaper guy, is one of many inane voices that now dot the daytime shows that are a part of ESPN’s Chip Bayless Journalism – if you say it loud enough and it’s crazy enough, people will listen, tweet it and repeat it. It’s the kind of caustic casualness many attribute to online “journalist” but it has seeped into ESPN, network newscasts and even the sainted daily newspaper. A brother or a cornball brother? What defines each? Is the brother toting a 40-ouncer and the cornball brother working a diploma and a briefcase? Read on.
“He’s not real. OK, he’s black, he kind of does the thing, but he’s not really down with the cause. He’s not one of us. He’s kind of black but he’s not really, like, the guy you want to hang out with because he’s off to something else.”
Rob Parker, ESPN
GH: Parker is just too good to be true if you happen to be looking for idiotic quotes for an Off The Couch column. So where is it that RG3 is “off to” that Parker would not want to hang? Work?
“I don’t know because I keep hearing these things. We all know he has a white fiancée. There was all this talk about how he’s a Republican, which, I don’t really care, there’s no information at all. I’m just trying to dig deeper into why he has an issue. Because we did find out with Tiger Woods. Tiger Woods was like, I’ve got black skin but don’t call me black.”
Rob Parker, ESPN
GH: A white fiancé AND he might be a Republican? Get a rope. The fact that Parker is able to tie Tiger Woods into his idiotic portrayal of RG3 is so inane it is perfect.
“Following yesterday’s comments Rob Parker has been suspended until further notice. We are conducting a full review.”
Mike Soltys, ESPN spokesman, USA Today
GH: What Soltys’ comments failed to mention is that ESPN will also be reaping the benefits of his ridiculousness. There’s no marketing like crazy.
“My parents shatter stereotypes. My dad, a black man, listens to Rick James, Tupac, Guns N’ Roses and the Eagles. He eats his chicken baked, not fried. And he doesn’t like watermelon. He dated a white woman, my mama. And she listens to bluegrass and gospel. She watches any movie starring Eddie Murphy, Ice Cube or Tyler Perry. Fried chicken is her favorite.”
Jenee’ Osterheldt, columnist, Kansas City Star
GH: I found it interesting that The Star chose to have Osterheldt cover Parker’s comments in her column rather than Sam Mellinger, the Star’s lead sports columnist. Osterheldt is best known for writing about the frivolousness of life as a single female in Kansas City. So why have her cover this story? Is it because she is black? How stereotypical is that of The Star?
“Race and being ethnic enough is a never-ending conversation in this country, and one I run into often. Apparently, there is a checkbox of what does and does not make you black. I have been accused of being not black enough, too black and not white enough all my life. I have a white friend who couldn’t believe I liked Reba McEntire. ‘That doesn’t seem like your kind of music,’ she said. I have black friends who said I acted white.”
Jenee’ Osterheldt, columnist, Kansas City Star
GH: I have never had a friend or foe tell me I was or was not too white, too black or too/not too of any color. But I am sick of those Reba commercials for her TV sitcom popping up on just about every show I record.
“KCSP-610 a.m. morning talk show host ‘Bulldog’ Bob Fescoe has landed on Radio Ink magazine’s inaugural list of the ‘30 Top Local Sports Talkers in Radio for 2012’ in its December issue. Fescoe, the host of ‘Fescoe in the Morning’ from 6-10 a.m. with sidekick Josh Klingler, was the lone sports talker in the Kansas City market to make the elite list and came in at #28.”
John Landsberg, Bottomlinecom.com
GH: If you wonder why sports media types like Rob parker spit out this kind of ridiculousness on a live broadcast, look no further than who gets rewarded as the country’s finest sports talkers. Fescoe might be the furthest thing we have in Kansas City from a quality broadcaster. But he is great at acting the fool and getting noticed for it. What sells is stupid – and Fescoe deserves all he gets.
“It’s a great honor. I am very humbled to have been selected. The folks with 610 and Entercom have been outstanding and I want to thank them. I also credit the passionate sports fans in KC as I believe we do have the best fans in sports right here in Kansas City.”
Bob Fescoe, Bottomlinecom.com
GH: I have a different take than Bulldog on his great honor. These national lists of media folks could not be a bigger sham. KMBZ’s Darla Jaye has been named six consecutive years by Talkers Magazine as a “top talker” in the country. Darla Jaye? Fescoe fits in fine with this group.
“So, Romeo Crennel just rocked one of the weirder press conferences of the season, chastising the media for — best I can tell — quoting him accurately. You be the judge: Romeo, on Wednesday: ‘(Breaston) needs to show that he has a greater understanding of the game plan and he can execute the game plan. If he can do that, then he can be in uniform.’ Romeo, on Thursday: ‘I don’t know how you get he doesn’t know the game plan out of that.’ Huh.”
Sam Mellinger, Don’t Kill The Mellinger, KCStar.com
GH: Oh how I wanted someone – anyone – at Crennel’s press conference to just break out in laughter at the preposterousness of Crennel’s doubletalk. If this Chiefs’ gig doesn’t work out, Romeo could take a radio job and be a great addition to Sports Ink’s top 30 list next year.
“This is an unraveling of a guy who is losing control of his organization. He’s putting his pettiness ahead of the team. This is absolutely a fireable offense.”
Kevin Kietzman, after Danny Clinkscale informed KK that the word out of One Arrowhead Drive is that Scott Pioli is upset with “any and all” Chiefs’ players who talked with or had contact with Todd Haley while the Chiefs were in Pittsburgh to play the Steelers, 810 AM
GH: The Candy Wrapper Man strikes again. Has there ever been a Chiefs at Raiders game that was less anticipated than this Sunday’s snoozer? Maybe this is The Clarks’ Christmas present to local retailers who typically see empty stores during a Chiefs’ game. Ho-ho-ho.
GregHall24@yahoo.com and Twitter / greghall24